Friday night I’m frantically trying to find homes for all sorts of things in the garage in readiness for the visit of Spot, (aka. Guy Turner), Lord of all things Viva. From somewhere I have acquired fourteen wheels and tyres. Four of which are from SHW, the rest have been collected over time, for what reason I know not what! Anyway they went outside in the garden, which didn’t endear me to Joanne. By nine at night the garage was as ready as it could be so I set about my next task…to wind up Spot. I’d printed some of my Vauxhall photo shoot pictures off, (mainly the ones with me in it), and then I stuck these around his bedroom. That should do the trick!

Saturday morning I was up the lark, (well the first ignoramus driving past with the radio blaring out) and went up to the garage to await the almighty one. I moved DHR to the front drive and blocked her in with the estate, as ‘Rova’ was to be garaged for the weekend as she needed some work.

At ten to nine the soft burble of a V8 reached my ears, just as I was attempting to change the spade connections on the electronic ignition Spot gave me some time ago. I hurriedly hid this at the back of the bench and went to greet his Lordship and feast my eyes on Rova. I complained to him that she sounds ‘soft’ and said he needs to fit a louder exhaust system in my opinion.

After getting my usual greeting of gifts, (Spot always brings me something, usually some old bits of metal; or wire; or cable ties; or something that he’s found laying around. (PS. I’m not complaining by the way)), we went for a cuppa. Now my gift this time was a cut above normal as he’d bought me a set of Rostyle centre caps. (And some old bits of metal as well).

Still, no time to mess around, he’d come to work! After putting his bags in the re-decorated bedroom and some swear words about the décor, we hit the garage.

Now some would call Spot a sad anorak, but not me. He’d brought with him a set of very detailed drawings he’d done, of what he thought we needed to do to SHW. Some people would think he has too much time on his hands!

We had a real good look at SHW and decided that no money would be laid out on this shell apart from welding wire and my time. (And the time of all the other lads I hope). I told Spot that it doesn’t matter if it takes me ten years, I have two working Viva’s and I’m in no rush. Time is the one thing I do have. So the plan is to attack the rear end first. This is where I will hone my welding and panel beating skills. (I can hear you all laughing, but I don’t care). If that is a reasonable success, I will then move on to the front end. This is where I could then ask Dave Wheatley to make me some gearbox cross members, a spare wheel well etc. but only after I think its feasible exercise. This could then be the point where we say the shells to far gone, (or my welding was to crap) and call it a day.

Spot had to explain what I was to do about four times in total I think, but he didn’t lose his rag with me. I set about cutting out the top section of the boot floor, just under the rear firewall behind the rear seats. This I managed with reasonable ease. (I seem to have a natural talent for breaking things up). I then cut out more of the boot floor metal, just leaving a section at the very rear. When I say I removed a lot of metal, SHW was depositing a fair amount all by her self. Rust lay everywhere. My floor turned from grey to rust within an hour. She’s sort of snake like and shedding her skin, a bit too quickly for my liking!

While I was doing this Spot had removed Rova’s front discs and started to work with my lathe. Now Spot had given me this lathe many moons ago and I’d only messed around with it a few times. He started it up after double checking everything, then asked me why it was going backwards! Evidently I’d put the motor on in the wrong direction. (No wonder I couldn’t get on with the bloody thing). Spot being Spot re-wired it so it went the right way and started on the discs. By the end of the day his discs were no better and he’s still getting vibration over fifty miles an hour. In the meantime I’d had a good day and had removed everything he’d asked me to remove.

Now we moved on to my welder. After looking at it Spot discovered that I had a bit missing from the bottom of the cable and the gas could escape from there and wasn’t going up to the torch. I got one from the other welder and tried some welding. I got a wonderful weld, the best I’ve ever done and it even impressed Spot. The only trouble was in my excitement I took my glove off and picked the metal up with my bare hands. God did it hurt and god did Spot laugh. I spent the next few hours putting my burnt finger in Spot’s cutting paste which caused even more merriment. I think we finished at about seven, then went for a beer and a curry, finished off with a nice red wine. To finish the evening on a good note we waited and watched the car chase in ‘Bullitt’ which was on channel four before going to bed.

Sunday and we were up when the cock crowed. Well nine anyway. Back in the garage Spot removed the top boot floor section on shorty while I was cleaning up around the bits I’d cut the day before. After this section was clean up we tried it in place. With only a little jiggling it fitted snugly.

Next I removed as much rust as I could from the inner rear wheel arch. It was then that I discovered even more rusty bits above the turrets. The back end of this car must have been left uncovered because you can trace a route of where the water was coming into her. Still, never mind, she will live again.

Spot removed anything good from ‘shorty’ and all the rear lights from SHW. He also fitted my new centre caps to the estate.

We only stopped to cook some sausages on the BBQ in the garden at lunchtime, apart from that we were in the garage working solidly all the time.

Next it was time to fit the electronic ignition to the estate as I couldn’t remember where he told me all the wires went, which is why it had been sitting on my bench and not fitted to the car. It only took about fifteen minutes and she fired first time.

Spot must have caught my bug while he was with me because while I was clearing the last of the metal from the wheel arch he picked up the broom and swept the garage for me. I forgot to take a picture of that!

He left at about five and got home at about seven I think, so not to bad. I had a great weekend and we got much more done than I’d imagined. It’s a pity his vibration problem wasn’t solved to make a perfect weekend but it gives us something to do another time.

I stayed in the garage until late cleaning up the rust from under SHW and by eight I could feel the ache in my legs and back. Just like the cars age is catching up with me.

What I will say and all joking apart, is that I do learn an awful lot from Spot on visits like this. He might not notice a lot of difference in me, but it does help me no end. Thank you Spot.